|
|
Well, this is my conclusion after immense researching and test results. I have concluded that the "American Zombie's" body movements would be slower than other nationalities' of zombies. This is a fact due to the rate that Americans consume fast food and other unhealthy consumables. Another fact that supports my logic is the extreamly low excerise rate among Americans. Something else that I found to be true is the brand of the famous "Arizona Green Tea" that most Americans drink would inhibit the ability of an undead body's nervous system to function, thus causeing slow mobility or none at all. Also the common medical drug called ibuprofen, "used for relief of minor pains" stays permanently in a dormant state inside the human body. But once death occurs the toxins stored in the body are released and gather in joints and some muscle tissue. Then those toxins harden and become almost a solid. This would make it even more impossible for the undead to move quickly or even at all. So with those facts and many others I have not explained yet I think it is safe to say that if a "zombie virus" outbreak ever did happen in the U.S. it would be a very small and controlable problem, Due to the fact that they wouldnt be able to move.
If all else fails........ Pop em in the Nogin
Accuracy and Simple Tactics |
Test results?
I'm gonna hit the highway like a Bat Out of Hell!
Wow. I'm underwhelmed. Sorry, Pop, but I have to give this post a thumbs-down.
All that needs to be said is this: FIRE = BAD
This was the most idiotic thing I've read today.
Because The Muppet Show Said So.
I cannot for the life of me fathom where you can state most of this as fact. Research, tests? Not one shred of anything believable to even back up what you're saying? C'mon...
"When there is no more room in Hell, the dead shall walk the Earth"
-- Because The MUPPET SHOW Said So.
This made me laugh, I needed a good laugh today. When I read "American Zombies" as the topic, the first thing that came to my mind was "American Gladiators."
"They drew first blood not me..." (Stallone in Rambo: First Blood)
Zombies with joint problems... Uhm, yeah.
The dead walk. Unless you can make that leap of fantasy, then there's no topic about zombies at all.
Unless you're going for the super-rabies theory... Ack. Hurts my head. (I'll just go with the FAQs definition).
I messed with Texas.
the talk of testing made me think of this http://ww2.zombieinitiative.org/node/1544
Obviously with his supreme genius he created a way to make zombies.
Because The Muppet Show Said So.
"I am the warrior in whom the old ways have combined with the new."
The greatest part of this argument is the Arizona Green Tea. Clearly since there is no American without a Social Security number or a daily supply of Green Tea, this will make American zombies slow. There are no holes in this logic. It is clearly the perfect post and we should all respect it as such!
As long as I have nothing, you can never take what's mine.