Oh god, I feel nervous opening up this line of questioning. It's like asking "if you could have any weapon, what would you get to fight zombies." But I ask honestly:
How would you retrofit a vehicle to be zombie-dystopia-ready and what vehicle would it be?
You may want to consider having the vehicle be:
1. armored to protect against zombies
2. fuel efficient
3. safe to drive
4. able to be purchased/owned by civilians
5. protected against road hazards
This means tanks just don't make sense, neither do bulldozers or the like. The vehicle needs to get people around, not just smash zombies. Let's assume, for the purposes of debate, that you are limited to having only one automatic rifle (no machine guns, flamethrowers, rocketlaunchers, etc.) and whatever other little weapons (handguns, sticks, knives, etc.) you want. Also: no chainsaws -- just trust me on this.
All that needs to be said is this: FIRE = BAD |
Hmm... that's a tricky one, only because you could come from so many tacks and use different strategies.
Initially I'd probably use anything sufficiently huge and heavy enough to plow down crowded roads, siphoning gas from abandoned vehicles and fuel pumps/buildings in the area. Simple.
Later on, though...
Fuel will become a huge problem. Oil will become very difficult to get a hold of- and burning it would be a huge waste. Later on, when oils will be needed to make simple plastics and to get some form of industry going again, we cannot go about burning oil or coal and wasting those precious resources.
Truth be told, a human-powered vehicle would be ideal... if we really had to, we'd probably devolve into steam-powered vehicles- I hate steampunk just as much of the next guy, but let's face it, wood's one of the few fuels we will have in endless supply. A tempramental, squeaking, steam-spewing buggy jouncing across a barren field is an amusing but impractical solution to the problem. As time wears on, fuel efficiency will become the single greatest pre-occupation to be faced with.
Hence, I advocate the quadricycle.
An abomination, isn't it? That's an example an American company manufactures for a cool 5000 dollars (and has done so for over 100 years, although not for so much money)- of course, we'll be mass-producing these things out of scrap iron and swatches of old fabric, so it won't be that big of an investment in the future. Supposedly, the Surrey weighs about 400-500 pounds, unloaded- easily light enough to be transported in the back of a pickup. Additionally, it can seat four, each of whom has a set of pedals to power the thing up hills with ease. Say, we were to get a few of these, and slap half-centimetre thick titanium or aluminum panels (for weight) across every space in the tubing framework. We'll cut 4 side access panels for doors (and we'll hinge the cut sections back on, with internal locking mechanisms, of course), and windows. Now, we won't be cutting a big hole for a window, no- that's much too dangerous. Instead, we'll be cutting 1 1/2 centimetre slits, about 3 feet wide, across the front and back panels, with half-centimetre thick bars in between. We'll then do the same for the side doors.
This bizarre setup makes an ideal window for our situation. Glass is too easily breakable, even the shatter-proof varieties, and tends to be very heavy. These slits still allow a lot of vision out of the vehicle, cannot be shattered or cracked (only bent out of shape, which can be hammered into place later), and do not allow prying zombie hands into the vehicle.
I'd also like to extend the back of this man-powered atrocity about 2 feet, for additional cargo room.
Now that we have the basic framework down, how are we going to outfit it? This vehicle cannot and never will be capable of slicing through shambling masses of zombies, so forget that. First, I'll weld stolen car/whatever headlights, so we can see our way around. After that, I'll happily take the automatic rifle and a bunch of ammo for it, and then mount it with zip ties or something above the drivers' seats, so the top of the barrel can be pushed through some slightly wider gaps in each 'window'. We will only use this if we have to, though- ammo will likely be very hard to get and valuable. I'll take 4 sets of sidearms, ammunition, knives and/or spears, water canteens, food rations, and a small med-kit, and pack them into 4 labelled back-packs I'll stow under every seat. This is so that, if we had to abandon the Surrey V2 somewhere (say, if we had to escape some zombies through a forest), we'd each have supplies to get us back to home base.
But how would we manage that on foot?
I wouldn't leave you with a very long walk back, I'm not that mean. Folding bicycles are the answer. Here's a good example...
The bicycle you see at the bottom folds into the package you see on the upper left- a bit bulky, but 4 of them would weigh less than 100 pounds, and they could easily be stowed in the cargo hold of the Surrey V2. If we had to abandon our main vehicle or even scatter, every crew member would have a reliable way of getting home.
Finally, I'd throw several spare tires (for the quad and the bikes), patch kits, large quantities of food and water, a car battery (to power the headlights), a medical kit containing things like morphine and more capable things than what each passenger would find in their own kits, road flares, perhaps a quantity of gasoline to give other unfortunate gas-guzzling vehicles a boost home, et cetera.
Be afraid. Hogan is worse than any zombie.
Wow. That is a very bizarre solution to the question posed. Kudos.
All that needs to be said is this: FIRE = BAD
Thanks. I just designed it primarily with fuel economy in mind- I'm of the opinion that, as time grinds on, the zombies will become less of a problem and we'll just be trying to rebuild. Fuels will be rare, so I thought up a plan that required none and was designed for evading zombies rather than attacking them directly.
Be afraid. Hogan is worse than any zombie.
Good idea Hamburglar, but what about one of those new Hybrids? They can be run by solar panels, which solves the fuel problem, they can generally go fast enough to mow down crowds (as some Hybrids are Jeep and Suburban sized) and they are safe to drive. You can buy then (if you have that kind of money) and with a few modifications you could make them armored to protect against zombies.
You're confused. Hybrids are not run off of solar panels- they are still run by gasoline. The nice thing is that, when you're idling or driving below about 20 mp/h, they run off the battery, which is charged by the gas motor. Fuel-efficient, yes, but at current times they cannot be run off of solar panels. You could charge your car all day in the sun and only have enough power to crawl a few miles. And the few efficient solar-powered cars we DO have are useless for our purposes, here are some examples-
http://www.mse.arizona.edu/faculty/birnie/solarcar/Mvc-085f.jpg
http://carpictures.duble.com/Honda/Solar%20Car/1.jpg
http://web.umr.edu/~reflori/intro/2003/July%2013-18%20pix/Solar%20Car%20Waterloo.jpg
See a recurring theme? The few efficient cars we have, the sort that take in at least as much power as it takes to drive, are fantastically expensive experiments that could never carry two people, let alone any sort of cargo. And on an overcast day you'd be fucked over to several degrees. And plus, solar panels are very expensive to manufacture- we could never d oit in a post-apocalyptic society.
So no, solar panels are clearly not the answer.
Be afraid. Hogan is worse than any zombie.
One thing we also have to consider is that once the invasion takes hold, every vehicle you can see suddenly becomes a finder's keepers affair. Like that lorry? Good. Lovely motorbike that? Great. Small girl's tricycle catch your fancy? Fine...
Which is why the Kannoneers have 1 particular vehicle they adore to their heart's content: The Rasengan. A modifed double-decker bus with troop transport and heavy artillery being the 2 main constituents. 6 TKs on the upper floor and armored doors and windows, as well as separate add-ons to the original chassis like 'wings' that add support and work to prevent tipping the vehicle over, as well as providing a platform for additional crew that can't find a seat inside
However, since for the purposes of this topic we're limited to pre-bought vehicles only, the Kannoneers do have a second vehicle that they use in relatively large quantities: The Chidori. Modified motorbikes, with armored casings that cover most of the front of the bike, and retractable wings that can slice open flesh easily at their typically high speeds. Cargo is a slim thing, because they are designed to be fast and get in and out of areas quickly, where the driver can grab small items, deliver messages, etc., or as support to take out moderate amounts of undead. Cargo missions are usually left to Rasengan.
Fuel for either isn't a major issue for the Kannoneers. Having used most of their initial vehicles as material to build their walls and gates, the fuel they siphoned off is remarkably substantial, and with their rapid acquisition of additional streets, it won't be running dry until the entire city is in their domain.
Once the city is all dry, however, THEN they can worry. I doubt that either would run too well on Biodiesel, not being any level of mechanic, nor can I safely say that they would run on electricity alone given modification.
(In a later chapter, one is also stolen, but that's another story
)
Bury deep, pile on the stones
Yet I will, dig up the bones
I think part of the point of the question was missed. There are many options that we can come up with that match one part or another. Shoot, a snowplow would just ROCK -- its big and strong and pretty darn near zombie-proof as it is, but fuel efficient it ain't. Similarly, a VW Golf TDI (diesel) could be made to function fairly easily given that biodiesel can be processed from vegetable sources - but sturdy it ain't, and a pain to fix if it breaks down.
The question I'm looking to get answered is what ONE VEHICLE can we mod to make a good vehicle for zombie dystopia and how can we mod it?
All that needs to be said is this: FIRE = BAD
I was thinking that myself. Many of the vehicles you will find abandoned will have no gas left- that's the reason people would leave the safety of their cars. I'll give you the benefit of the doubt and assume that every car you find has half a tank of gas inside of it.
A huge, heavy double-decker bus would need the fuel from dozens of standard vehicles to fill it up- and even then, if driven regularly, that won't last for very long at all.
It becomes a downhill battle- once all of the fuel near you has been collected, you'll need to travel farther and farther to get at that fuel, using gas to get there. Soon, you'll be using more fuel just getting to the cars than you're bringing back. Your 'grand plan' won't function for very long at all, simply because the vehicles you've suggested will become pretty hunks of metal once you can't go out and get petrol to power them any more.
Be afraid. Hogan is worse than any zombie.
(I was curious...revived)
"They drew first blood not me..." (Stallone in Rambo: First Blood)
My choice would be a Jeep Wrangler. The Jeep gets good gas mileage and its within a budget. Your probably thinking they have canopy tops. But they can come with hard-tops. I would fit it with a basic lift-kit, 44" off-road tires, brush guard with two off-road lights, light bar on top, and winch on front and back. I would wielded bars across the back windows and tail-gate window. I would then wield a metal frame around the windshield, driver, and passanger windows outside and inside the car. I would use the frames to wield chicken wire outside the car. Then wield another layer inside the car, that way the glass is in between.
When Your Pushed, Killing's As Easy As Breathin! --John Rambo (Rambo 4)